I’m called for an interview with a promising company today! Wow. I thought I would never even get a full-time job like ever.
A bit of fact about me:
Since I graduated last August, I honestly didn’t even apply to any company for any full time job. Why? Because I don’t want to leave my parents. I’m sure I’ve mentioned about it before. I love my parents that much that I don’t even care if people start calling me Daddy’s Girl or Mama’s Favorite Daughter for not wanting to break my comfort zone. But my hometown, the place that I’ve been living in for almost forever now, is a barren land. There’s no such people who run business who think design and illustration is a thing here. Those include my parents and all their ally, to be honest. People just think I’m only playing around in my studio everyday. I draw upon request, but that’s that. Salary by commission, that’s not a real career. How will I make a living with it. They’re worried about my future and slowly push me to get a full time job. Especially because I score a good grade in my GPA *ahem* and not bragging it on a resume or cover letter is a waste of sweat extortion. And I do appreciate their concerns. A lot. Me, my self, is actually been worrying too. Mostly because I don’t always draw a masterpiece and there are dozen of other artists out there who compete for a job with me.
In short I was frightened at time when I decided to at least trying once to apply for a job like what common fresh graduates usually do. So I start looking for career opportunity from any promising company in the nearest city from my hometown. And I just find one who may suits me. And I go with it. The lazy part about it is creating the resume and portfolio, and the laziest part is writing a cover letter. It took an entire day to complete all of them before I send them out to that company without hoping too much.
And today they are calling me!
This is a foreign Dutch company and I was applying for marketing communication staff position who handle all their marketing design and publication stuffs. If this one succeed, that means I will be moving to another city. ANOTHER BIGGER CITY. Not that big, actually. But quite big enough to be able to watch world’s latest movie in the cinema (seriously, my hometown is really that small, it doesn’t even have any urban entertainment service anywhere; including no up-to-date bookstore and no comfy coffee shop). And that also means I will be living my own life in that new city. Starting out my life once again and all of its things. But once again, if the interview will went well.
So what’s the point of these? I don’t know though. Maybe it’s okay to leave my parents now because my sister is assigned to work in our hometown by her company. She will be in charge for accompanying my parents in their daily basis from now on. And also maybe it is really the time for me to bravely get out from my comfort zone. Who knows… There are plenty of exciting stuffs for me remains undercover until I’m fully ready and prepared.
Learn the rules, before you bend or even break them.
I used to be feared of many earthly things like being hurt, being rejected, bad temptation, and even change. I’m not saying that I am not scared of anything anymore now but I think things that I should fear the most is the fear it self. It is really time consuming and most of time I find it unworthy.
Let’s be honest, at some point in our life we have an attitude problem: pride, jealousy, impatience, anger, gossip, broken promises, and even wrong addiction that has been taken control your mind. Habits like these have things in common: THEY HURT YOU. THEY HURT OTHERS.
Let’s be honest again that we will never be able to overcome them by ourself alone. You probably have determined to change but often you find yourself saying
"I’ve tried everything but nothing helps. It happens so regularly that it’s unevitable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is always there to trip me up. I know that I need to be delight in God’s will but it’s just pretty obvious that not all parts of me joins in that delight. Some parts of me are just covertly rebel that when I least expect it, they take charge."
I feel like I know the struggle. I completely undergo them all my life. Just like you, I tried and tried and tried to fight the battle. One thing that I learned is that I have Him, my God, Jesus. Because he loves me so much and unconditionally, He would be always willing to help me after I’ve messed up again and again.
Recovery is a process. When developing habits took time, overcoming it will too.